How to Deal with Critics

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Fist breakthrough white wallA while back I was at the doctor’s office waiting to be seen. As I sat outside in the waiting room I glanced through the piles of reading materials looking for something to read. I’ve found that you either get medical magazine (Colonoscopy Weekly) or old, tattered, dated magazines which in this case included a Time magazine dated July 5, 2010.

I opted for the dated Time and read 10 Questions which featured novelist James Patterson. He was asked a number of different questions, but this one caught my attention:

What do you say to critics like author Stephen King who say you are not a great prose stylist?

His answer was profound:

“I am not a great prose stylist. I’m a storyteller. There are thousands of people who don’t like what I do. Fortunately, there are millions who do.”

All of us will be subjected to criticism from time to time. It’s easy to focus on the handful of critics and ignore the people who genuinely like what you do. I got stuck in this trap years ago when reading critiques from my workshops and getting depressed by the handful of criticisms.  I should have paid attention to the majority that were glowing reviews.  There are three main reasons for criticism:

  1. The person just didn’t like YOU. Don’t feel bad.  I don’t like some people and will probably criticize them.
  2. The person didn’t like the STYLE you used. In my workshops, I use lots of stories, analogies and metaphors.  You’ll find examples of root canals, rectal surgery, trapping monkeys, sheep herding, picking up dog crap, my family, etc.  Sometimes I get criticized for them but guarantee the attendee will NOT forget the point I was making.
  3. The person just has it in their nature to criticize. If you study Temperaments, the one known as “NT” is focused on competence.  It’s just in their nature to want to give constructive feedback.  I recently had an attendee in my workshop note that “The instructor’s laser pointer wasn’t bright enough.”

Of course you might be criticized because you’re not very good. If that’s the case, do some soul-searching and work on either changing your career or focusing on how to get better.

James Patterson has a great way of dealing with critics. How will you deal with yours?